Where did the time go?

I haven't been able to talk about this without crying but I can write it because I can type without seeing. My baby Tamara started Kindergarten this year and it was one of the roughest things I've ever gone through. I was really depressed the first couple of days. It has taken alot of getting used to not having her around. She always made me smile and always gave me something to look forward to, but she was ready to go to school. The night before school started I went to her room to tuck her in. I didn't want to, I knew that if I let her go to sleep she would wake up and leave, and then I realized she was going to wake up and leave anyway. So I was laying with her in her bed with my head on her shoulder. She put her arm around me as if she knew how bad I was hurting and just ran her fingers through my hair. We talked and talked and I told her how the time I had been home with her was the best time I'd ever had in my life. The tears filled my eyes and a huge lump choked my throat and I found that no more words would come. It was then my little baby said, "Daddy" to which I replied "Yes" in a tear choked voice. "I love you Daddy." I couldn't hold the tears in anymore. Good thing it was dark. Then my little angel broke my heart as she said, "Daddy, I have to go to sleep now Daddy." There it was, the moment I was trying to avoid but could no longer be postponed. With tears rolling down my face, I said "I know baby," and tucked her in kissed her goodnight and went out to put the pieces of my broken heart back together. Being a parent is awesome but nobody or nothing can prepare you for things like this. I know she will do great and has awesome things in her future, but how I wish I could somehow make time roll back, however selfish and unfair that might be. Anyway I made a video for her while she was at school on her first day and thought I'd let all of you see it. Hope you enjoy, hope it makes you cry, its only fair that everyone else feels my sorrow too! :)


    Hi Adam, It's me, Dawn, Chad's mom! Welcome to the blogging world. I'm a bit new at it myself but it is fun reading everyone's blogs. Well, your babies are growing up....cherish every moment and buckle your seatbelt cause you're in for the ride of your life! First is school, slumber parties, boyfriends, cars, dating, and the big one.....when you get to walk them down the isle. You've only just begun the fun!! Don't mean to depress you! haha! Well, after that comes grand kids and they are amazing too!!

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