SHOPPING STINKS!!!

My wife asked me if I wanted to go shopping today. HA! The answer was a very loud NOOO!!! Who in their right mind would go shopping the Saturday before Christmas? Undoubtedly my goofy wife. I mean the idiots are out in full force today, wrecks happening, people fighting over stupid things that they will throw away before next Christmas, it's ridiculous. What ever happened to shopping ahead of time, you know NOT PROCRASTINATING!!!! I really don't understand why anyone would face that mob today. UGH!!! I guess I'm just a guy and I think like a guy but shopping is really dumb and confusing. I mean really, your wife gives you mixed signals on what to buy her like for instance; This year my wife told me, "I really don't need or want anything." HA!! It's a LIE! If on Christmas morning we all opened presents but her, I'm pretty sure I would be kicked out and cut off for the entire 2008 season. Why do women do that? I gave her a list, I mean the least she could do is say "Well, I can't think of anything this year so why don't you get me something you would like me to have." Now that would open a variety of options for me, like maxing out my Angel card at Victoria Secret's (yes I have an Angels card, it's something every married man should have!). But instead I'm left wondering aimlessly from store to store, looking for the perfect gift that she didn't ask for!!! But tell me, what's a guy to do? HUH?? And that my fellow readers is all I have to say about that!

Finally!!!

School is over for the semester!!!!! I am so glad. This has been one of the most challenging semesters of school I have had. I believe in total I wrote over 100 pages this semester and read (well didn't read but tested over) 4 books. It's all done now though and with a 4.0 I might add :) Now it's time to focus on the HOLIDAYS! I have 8 days til Christmas and nothing for my wife, mom, grandma, etc, etc..... I know I should be trying to find something but nothing has occurred to me yet. Besides it's my first official day of the Christmas break and I have to get stuff ready for Tamara's Party tonight (@ Chuck E. Cheese, UGHH!!!) so I think the shopping can wait for one more day. Besides men shouldn't shop! Pastor said yesterday a study was done on men aged 22-70 that were going holiday shopping. During the actual shopping experience their heart rate stayed at the level of a fighter pilots in action. Women of the same age experienced no rate change. I find this to be the truth, I hate shopping. Pam always checks my pockets before we leave the house to go shopping to make sure I am not caring a gun (I swear I would use it.) Anyway today I will rest, at least until noon and then I have to start getting stuff ready for the above mentioned party. That leaves me just one hour, so gotta run, BYE!!!

Capturing The Moment

Have you ever thought in your life, "What if I missed my chance?" What if that once in a life time opportunity came by and you did nothing? What if you are in that moment now and are afraid to move on it? Most of all what if every moment is one of those moments? This is what I struggle with all the time. I love my wife and I love my children with all my heart. I feel they are my greatest accomplishment. However, in order for me to be fulfilled, to feel like my life is worth something I need to find that "something," I was made to do. I feel like everyone was put on earth for a purpose, I'm ready to know what mine is. What if I have already missed my opportunity? What if because of fear, I failed to move? What happens if that moment never comes around again, then what? I pray all the time for God to give me direction and show me where I should be, and I sit and I wait. I continue going to school although I'm not sure that is the right path. I continue to work on golf, although I'm not always sure about that either. I want to have passion for something, I want to be great and leave a mark on this world. I'm just afraid I might have missed the opportunities that would have already set me on that path. For the longest time, my biggest fear has been failure. I do not want to let anyone down. Yet I'm afraid to truly go or do what I need to do I may have to let some people down, and I hate the thought of that. I'm tired of wondering, I'm tired of feeling like I have no purpose. I'm ready for a change yet I don't know where to start. Everyday, I like to read the first lines to one of my favorite songs. Most of you probably haven't heard the song, but the lines are: "Look, if you had one shot, one opportunity to seize everything you ever wanted-One moment, Would you capture it or just let it slip?" I don't know where I'm going or what my life is destined for but I know I want to be ready to capture my moment when it comes around, I'm just not to sure if I know how.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PAM!!

My smart, beautiful, caring, sexy wife turned 21 today, YEAH!!! Like a fine wine she just keeps getting better with age :) Happy Birthday Baby I love you with all my heart, you are more than I could have ever asked for in a wife, friend and mother. I hope you have an awesome birthday, you deserve it.

I LOVE YOU!!!!

If you see my brain...

I had two exams last week, I wrote a 14 page paper today, I have an exam Thursday and two 5 page papers due Friday. Next Tuesday I have two final exams and next Thursday I have one final. If anyone happens to see my brain would you please tell it I miss it and I promise that finals are almost over! AAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Miss Smarty Pants

This morning on the way to school, Tamara tells me she is excited because one of her friends is having a bowling birthday party. I asked her when and she said "at the bowling alley." I said, "no not where, when." She replied, "I don't know, don't you know when they have bowling parties?" I said no and left it at that. Then from the back seat with a questioning voice I hear, "Do you ever try thinking?" I wasn't sure who she was talking to so I replied, "Huh?" To which she replied, "Thinking, did you ever try it. Maybe you should think sometimes." If she had not been sincere and really didn't mean any harm behind it I probably would have whooped her for that one (and if I hadn't been trying really hard not to laugh where she could see me.) Don't know what I'm going to do with that child. I guess I better start "thinking!"

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Me and my girls are about to head out to Waco to visit Pam's dad. Probably won't write anything until after then so everyone be safe and don't eat too much! Oh by the way... 32 Days until CHRISTMAS!!

Slow Down

I remember the first time she wanted to make her own peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I was unsure of how she would do, but besides the peanut butter and jelly all over the counter, she did awesome. MaKayla has always enjoyed cooking. When she was little her favorite show was Emeril Live! She would walk around the house yelling BAM! For one Christmas she even got an Emeril cooking set with an apron and everything. So really it shouldn't be a surprise that at the ripe age of 7 she wanted to cook supper. The other day she said, "Dad, I want to learn how to cook." I said "okay what do you want to cook." She replied, "spaghetti." Okay, so today we went to HEB and bought the ingredients. I wrote down what she needed and she picked it all out, from the flavor of the sauce, type of noodles, bread, cheese, everything. Then we came home and laid out all the ingredients and I stood back and watched my baby girl cook her first meal. I touched nothing, I only instructed the whole time. She was a complete pro, acting as if she has been cooking her whole life, (mainly because in her mind she has rehearsed this moment for years). Everything turned out wonderful, she made spaghetti with sausage and meat sauce, bow tie noodles, and buttery garlic toast. As I was watching her stir, her spaghetti sauce and noodles on the stove, I kept seeing this small curly haired curl smearing peanut butter and jelly all over the world and sometimes getting a little on a piece of bread too. Where in the world did that little girl go?











I Knew There Was A Catch!

Today I had a really big paper to write for my sports psychology class. I have really been dreading writing it because it had to be pretty extensive somewhere in the range of 6-7 pages, which isn't too bad if it's something you want to write but an assignment like this is something else. So anyway, today I sat down around 9:30 with my notes in hand ready to write. I wrote and I wrote, I researched along the way and attacked that paper like a man on a mission. Before I knew what happened 3 1/2 hours had passed and I had wrote 9 pages (oops!). There, I was done, that was easy, nothing is ever that easy but I guess today is my lucky day.....but wait, there was a catch. After picking up the girls from school I come home to pick up because some friends are coming over. I go in our closet to turn on the light and nothing. I change the bulb, still nothing! Okay I can handle this, I ran to the store to pick up a new light fixture, put it in and badda bing there was light. Alright, it's still my lucky day....but wait, there was a catch. After fixing the light I come to the kitchen to get a drink and see the sink backed up. This has been an on going problem for the last couple of years. I always blame my wife for it but I'm pretty sure it's just because the pipes are 50 years old. Anyway, I whip out the ole plunger and attack that sink like a fat man on a hot dog. I'm tearing that sink up, giving it all I got, jumping up and down...nothing, still blocked. So I run back to the store pick up some Drano and pour it in the sink. I wait the required 15 min come back and the sink is drained, HA! I ran water in it to see if I had done my job and whadda ya know, it backed up again. So I poured more Drano down the sink and left to go pick up some pizza. I believe it was at this time I made a statement like, "Could something else please go wrong!" Well, my wish was granted. I came home from picking up the pizza to find water all under my carport, all I could do was laugh. As of now, I have pulled out my dishwasher, cut a hole in the wall, found a hole in my pipes, a clog that won't come unclogged and to top it off I found evidence of mice living behind my dishwasher....but wait, there's a catch. I QUIT! I'm going to bed it will all have to wait until tomorrow, perhaps tomorrow is my lucky day.

UH OH!

39 DAYS UNTIL CHRISTMAS!!
(I'm even getting worried about it now!)

Music

Okay so I added music to my blog. I chose songs that pretty much represent me, or how I feel. I don't know about it yet, I personally can't read and listen to music at the same time but thought it might ad another dimension into "who I am." Let me know what you think.

A Day Of Firsts

This weekend I took MaKayla on a quail hunt with a buddy and me. She was all wound up and ready to go, despite all the warnings I gave of how much running and walking we would do. The morning came and I woke her up @ 5:30 a.m. and she hopped up and got ready faster than I did, you could see the excitement in her face. The lease is about 40min. away and you could tell how restless she was on the way down. When we arrived we put on her snake guards (which nearly covered her whole leg) and away we went, we drove and walked and walked and drove not seeing anything. Then out of nowhere we found the mother load. Birds were jumping off the ground from everywhere, shots rang out like firecrackers on the fourth of July and we ran and ran chasing those little birds. In the midst of of all this running, we ran across a 4ft. rattlesnake basking in the sun. After a little fun with our slithery friend, it was time for him to take a dirt nap, and that was that. After a while of this shooting and excitement my little hunter was given out. She decided she would sit back at the truck and kill ants with her knife while we ran around. About every 10 min I'd run back over and check on her and make sure everything was okay. She was quietly whittling a stick then using it as a spear to kill ants (who says you need a boy). Around 3:00 we finally had all the hunting we could take and decided it was time to go home. She was pooped and ready to go, but kept on talking about how much fun we had. On the way home we saw an Al-sups and had to stop in for a coke and chimichanga. I told her she had to try a chimichanga. She asked what it was, and I told her "honestly I don't know but its really good." She got one and the rest is history. My baby has now become a chimichangaholic. She went on and on about how good they were and kept asking "but Dad what's in them?" I kept telling her, "I don't know and we probably don't want to know just eat and be happy." So there it was, at the ripe age of 7 my baby went on her first quail hunt, saw her first live rattlesnake up close (then saw it die), and experienced the crown jewel of the quick-stop, the "chimichanga!" What a day!

Hiccups

I don't know what to think of my youngest daughter. Today when I picked her up from school she had a bad case of the hiccups. I told her to hold her breathe and count to ten and after our fifth try, we got them to go away. It was at this time she asked, "Dad, is it okay if I have a boyfriend who has the hiccups too?" I said "Why, who has hiccups that is your boyfriend?" To which she replied matter of factly, "Incidentally it's Carson." Not too sure where she got that word but I'm moving her to a monastery, the sooner the better. GEEZ!!

SHE'S BACK!

After months of griping at Pam, she finally found her username and password and is going to start blogging again. YEAH!! Everyone check out her blog from time to time, hopefully she'll get on the ball soon.
Watching You Breathe
By: Adam Lewis

Every night while you are sleeping
I sneak in and watch you breathe
Inhale and exhale like a quiet symphony.
Since the day we brought you home
I’ve done this every night
To say a little prayer for you
And make sure everything’s alright.
I try so hard not to wake you
As I tip toe through your room
But as I trip and stumble over toys and clothes
That is sometimes hard to do.
I thank God that he has blessed me
With two such wonderful girls
And I know my life would be empty
Without you in my world.
So sleep tight little angels
I wish you such sweet dreams
As all of mine are coming true
While I sit and watch you breathe.

By The Way...

46 Days until CHRISTMAS!!!
45 by the time most of you will read this :)
First I would like to thank everyone for their prayers for Tamara. She is at home now and doing great. Laughing, playing and acting pretty much like herself. It is crazy how one minute she is perfectly healthy and the next she has pneumonia, but that is the way it is. Prayer is an awesome thing, and I know that everyone not only prayed for Tamara but for Pam and me as well. I never felt worried or overly concerned at the hospital, just complete confidence that everything was in God's hands and would be okay, and that is not like me so I know that prayers helped.

Have you ever in your life thought you were being faithful yet seeing no rewards for your faithfulness? I do this a lot. I tell God, "hey, I am not a bad guy, I go to church, I serve you, I pay my tithes, where are my blessings?" (Its usually at this time that I look around me and shut up) Anyhow, mine and Pam's entire marriage has been an uphill climb. Nothing has ever come easy for us and it has only made us stronger. Finances have always been a struggle for us, having just one income while she was in school, now while I'm in school. Somehow we have always had enough. Maybe not for the things that we want, but for the things that we need. We pay our tithes faithfully and sometimes when you don't make a lot that's really hard to do, but we have committed that to God (after all it is his anyway). Lately I have been down a little about our finances. Things have been kind of tight trying to pay off bills here and there and get to a point where we have a little more freedom. The other day I was praying and was discouraged and I said something to the affect of "God we pay our tithes, why are we still struggling so much, a little help would be nice." Well I got home today and I had a check in the mail from UTPB for $1000 for a grant that I didn't apply for yet had been awarded and I get the same grant in the spring as well. What's so cool about this is my other grant pays for my tuition and books so this is all extra. An extra $2000. Wow, God really is faithful to those who are faithful to him. It's not always in our timing but it's always when the timing is best for us.

Wow

My baby girl has been horribly sick today. I don't know that I have ever seen either of my children this sick. It is a scary and helpless feeling as you watch your child whimpering and throwing up, knowing there is nothing you can do to help. Even though I am the protector she looks for to keep her safe from all the bad stuff, nothing I could do would help her right now. On top of her being sick I have a really big biology exam tomorrow and I had intended spending the entire day studying instead I have been in the Dr. office all day. I'm now trying to get back in that studying mode. Before I could do that though I was having a little down time and just contemplating the day and my emotions, wishing it was me lying there in her bed hurting instead of her. Right then out of nowhere it came to me that, that is exactly what Jesus did. He knew the hurt and pain we would be in and the suffering we would endure, so he took it all from us. Wow! There are no words to describe how much I wish I could take my baby's spot right now, and there are no words to describe how unbelievably grateful I am that my Father took mine.

That Was Close

So last night we went to the "Night of Lights" carnival at church and had an awesome time. Way too much candy and Frito pies. Anyhow, at one point during the night Tamara wanted to go ride the ponies (for the hundredth time) so I went and stood in line with her. Well we finally got up to the front and when we got there, there were two little ponies ready to ride, as we are about to give the person our tickets I hear this mom and son talking behind me, this was the conversation.

Son: I don't want that one
Mom: That's all they have
Son: But I don't want that one
Mom: Well honey they both have nuts so I guess you're just going to have to wait.
(at this point I'm kind of cocking my head to the side to see what these little ponies are packin and hoping Tamara wasn't seeing the same thing)
Son: I don't want to wait!
Mom: Well all they have is Baby Ruth and Payday and they both have nuts so you'll just have to wait.

WHEW!!! I thought me and Tamara were going to have to go into an anatomy lesson right there in the pony line. I just hope the ponies names weren't Baby Ruth and Payday :)

Happy Halloween!

I know a lot of people do not celebrate Halloween and that's cool, after all it was originally a day of bad celebration. However, my entire life it was never made to be that way, and for millions it was the same way. My memories of Halloween are the smell of mom making popcorn balls, candied apples and homemade suckers, carving pumpkins with mom and dad, Charlie Brown's Halloween special on T.V., fun movies at school and carnivals at night and you can't forget the candy. Normally I got so much candy, that there was no way that in 6 months I could have it all polished off. I didn't always like dressing up, but I did always look forward to Halloween. As a parent now, I see the same excitement in my children's eyes. I see the anticipation of the candy to come, I get the questions, "so how many days left now dad?" I see the enjoyment when we all set down and watch a silly Halloween movie together, and the excitement of carving a pumpkin. I believe that Halloween is bad only if you make it bad, for me it never was and for my children it never will be either. Tonight we will dress up, go visit some family members then go to church to the "Night of Lights" carnival and have the bestest of times. Today I pray for everyone's safety as there are people who try to take this fun day and make it something evil and bad. Get your treats ready, your costumes and candy bags cause tonight it's time to TRICK OR TREAT!



Here are the pumpkins our family carved. MaKayla and I did the Pirates of the Caribbean and Pam and Tamara did Dracula. Amy and Alex did some too, but Amy already posted those on her blog. Hope you enjoy.


Not That It Matters But...

THERE ARE ONLY 55 DAYS LEFT UNTIL CHRISTMAS!!!!
(When did summer end?)

Maybe

It has been a long time since I felt like I had a church I could call home. It has been a real struggle over the last year and a half to find the place God wanted my family to be in. Now I'm not going to say that we have found that place for sure yet but maybe we have. We have tried lots of churches in Odessa and Midland since leaving Harvest Time, and nothing was right. We even tried Temple Baptist once and at the time didn't really care for it, why I don't know, we just didn't. Well recently Temple has built a new building and changed from Baptist to Nondenominational and is now called Crossroads Fellowship. Our good friends invited us to come try it out and reluctantly we went, thinking we have already been here and didn't like it, only this time it was different. Our children absolutely loved it, and the service was really good. Not as fiery as the services we were used to, but God was there and the preaching was awesome. So to make a long story short, we have continued going there and it is continually growing on us and best of all our girls are happy and looking forward to going and everyone makes us feel welcome. I have been praying God would send us in the right direction and in his time he did. Now as soon as I can figure out how to get God on my clock, things will go a whole lot smoother in my life :)

Crazy Drivers

This morning as I was taking the girls to school, the drivers were particularly stupid along the way. I mean no blinkers, quick stops, cutting people off, and it was really aggravating me. As I'm driving next to this one guy he's on his phone blabbing away and constantly drifting over into my lane. I guess out loud I yelled "come on idiot get off the phone and pay attention." It was at this time that my most brilliant youngest daughter Tamara, sitting quietly in the back seat said, "Why don't you just pull up to him and give him the "CRAZY EYE" maybe then he'll pay attention." I was just in the right mood to do such a thing so I pull up next to this guy, stared at him until he looked at me and then WHAM! I gave him the crazy eye. I can't say that it made him pay attention, however he did give me a one fingered salute and drove off real fast. To which Tamara replied, "See I told you it would work." What smart children I have! :)

A Day With My Dad

I remember as a little kid waiting for my dad to get home so I could jump out and scare him as he came through the door. I'm pretty sure I never scared him but he always acted surprised. Then there were the times playing catch for hours on end without complaint even though now I know there was probably so many other things he could have been doing. My dad always went out of his way to make sure that he spent enough time with me. He taught me to fish, hunt, play ball, drive, work and overall how to me a man and not just any kind of man but a man of God. I remember those days like it was yesterday, I don't remember a lot from being a kid but I remember time spent with dad, I remember the anticipation of each event. Now at age 27 it is still really the same. This last weekend, my dad and I played in a golf scramble together. We didn't win, heck we didn't even come close to winning but I feel like I won because I got to spend a day with my dad. All week before the tournament I anticipated the day I would soon be spending with just him and me. Too many times when I'm around him I have to share him with my family, and my girls (which he is quite fond of) but not on this day, on this day for just awhile I was 8 years old again looking up at the greatest man in my life ready for the adventure that lie ahead. These days I don't look at him in as much awe as before, like daddy can do anything, but more with respect, love and admiration for a great man who is everything I want to be. It was an awesome day, a day that has now been logged into my memory bank of all the great father and son things we have done. I guess it just goes to show you, you are never to old for a day with your dad.

Tagged

Seven things you never knew about me and now wish you didn't. Or as you put it...Seven strange/weird/crazy things about me: How in the world did this strange thing come about?? Okay here goes nothing.

1. I am a perfectionist. It is almost to the point most of the time that it becomes compulsive. It drives my wife crazy but I like things done a certain way and I feel like it should be done right if you are going to do it. This is also the one thing that pretty much drags me down and consumes me most of the time. Do you realize how hard it is trying to be perfect? My favorite saying about all this is "What drives me, destroys me."

2. I love all kinds of music. I am not particular really to one type of music. I love well written songs or songs with deep meaning. If you can feel the writer or artists emotions in a song that is awesome to me. I love old country, my favorite is Don Williams. I could sit and just have the lights down low and ole Don in the back ground softly crooning. However, I really like how Eminem writes as well. I know alot of his songs are vulgar but some of his songs where he writes about himself are really revealing and you can really tell how he feels. I am a definite music lover, we recently got cable internet and I am now constantly downloading good songs. My I-tunes library is as diverse as it gets.

3. I like to write. Writing is one of the few things in life that I don't have to think about to do. I can just sit down at a computer and write and write. I can bull corn my way through a history paper or just sit and write like I'm doing now. It really doesn't matter what I write I just like to write. I don't like to be told to write something though. That makes me mad, I like to have options.

4. I hate Mexican food. I know this could possibly be the weirdest thing I could possibly say living in Odessa, TX but it is true. I mean it's not healthy, it gives me gas, and it's not pretty to look at before or after you eat it! I like hamburgers, love steaks and BB-Q and any other of the what I call "cowboy foods," but I just can't do Mexican food. It is my wife's favorite so at times I have to make exceptions but I'm always looking for those chicken strips or salads on the menu.

5. I am a cowboy at heart. If I had it my way I would live out in the middle of nowhere. I would heat my house with a black kettle stove and hunt and fish for my food. I would ride my horse to town and my spurs would jingle when I walked. I love to wear cowboy hats and boots and mess with livestock, I like a simple life with no t.v., no radio, just my wife and kids and nature around me. I hate how fast paced life is and wish there was some way to slow it down. I would move to a tiny town in a second if I didn't think all my girls would be bored to death.

6. I'm addicted to working out. My day feels empty without a trip to the gym. I can be having the worst day and after an hour and a half of working out, everything is better. I love elliptical machines they make it much easier for me to do cardio, since in my older age running creates great pain for my back and ankles. If I go more than a day without working out, I am a grouch. I don't ever feel satisfied with how I look though. No matter how in shape I am or how much my wife or other people compliment I always want more. I guess that's the perfectionist in me coming out again.

7. I really don't like body hair. I know this is a weird one and since everyone else threw one in I figured I would too but I guess this is my one thing I really don't like. I mean we are humans not woolly mammoths so why do we need hair? If I am cold I will put on warm clothes, I don't need hair to keep me warm. Oh and heaven forbid my wife goes a day without shaving, you could exfoliate and elephants back with her prickly legs. I'm pretty sure that goes for all women though. I remember as a kid my mom running her leg across me and thinking "dang cactus leg, keep to yourself!" Now I know some people think hair is sexy and good for them but I am not one of them. I like smooth hairless skin! There so now you know I'm weird but think about all the time men and women could save if we didn't have to shave. I rest my case.

I hope I never get tagged again this was hard work, but now I tag Pam(if she ever blogs again) or whoever else reads this because everyone else I know is already tagged :)

EXTREME BOY HUNT!!!

I am now on an extreme boy hunt to find the little romantic punk who gave my baby mono and eliminate him!
(I know she could have gotten it anywhere but its just way to close to the romantic boy statement so all little boys at school better run for their lives!)

My New Drink

For those of you who didn't know, I quit drinking cokes on October the 6th. It has been a very rough 12 days. I only have 18 days more to go and hopefully I will have created a new habit. In place of the eleventy million cokes a day that I was drinking I have started drinking lots and lots of tea from Bush's Chicken. This has been okay yet the flavor is getting old, so I began a quest to find my new drink. I am happy to report that as of right now, I am becoming addicted to Vitamin Water. It comes in many flavors, some good some not so good. I like the multi-v, xxx, and focus flavors. Which are lemonade, blueberry-pomegranate, and strawberry-kiwi. This is a good thing because I hate water by itself so hopefully this will help me in both drinking more water and getting past my cokes. Okay well, I am completely out of things to write about obviously since I'm writing about water. I'm going to class now to destroy more brain cells, and drink my vitamin water.

I Hate Tests!!

I think my professors are plotting against me. They are all getting together and saying, "hey let's put all of Adam's tests on the same day!!" I say, "What a horrible idea that is!!" I am so brain dead right now I can't even think crooked. So in light of all this testing I thought I would post a test for all of you to take. It only has one question and it is worth 100 pts! Here it goes:
If you choke a Smurf what color will he turn?
Good luck your time starts now!

Blessed

Today I feel blessed. Not because I'm having some super spectacular day, actually it's been quite the opposite. Yet I feel blessed anyhow. I feel blessed because God allowed me to wake up this morning. I feel blessed because the love of my life was there laying beside me to kiss me and tell me good morning. I feel blessed because I got to wake my girls up with a hug and a kiss and get them ready for school. I feel blessed because I have a wonderful home and cars that work. I feel blessed that God has given me the means and ability to go to school and better myself and my family. I feel blessed for the income that God has provide my family with. I feel blessed that I live in a country with so many freedoms and so many men and women defending those freedoms for me and my family daily. There are so many days that these things and more go overlooked in the hustle and hurry and stresses of everyday life but these blessings are awesome and more than I deserve. It's sad that it sometimes takes seeing other people's losses to realize all you have. Today my heart has been sad for Rhonda, Sydney, and Tiffany Mitchell who lost a Husband and a Daddy last night. He was a great man of God and is in heaven right now singing and rejoicing as he always did here on earth. Thank you God for one more day and all that you have given me for I know that I am truly blessed.

Romantic Boy!!!!

Okay that's it I've had it. Tonight I was sitting in the den painting Tamara's finger nails (and doing a very bad job at that), when out of the blue she says she is sad because this little boy Carson who was her boyfriend, broke up with her. Okay, for one who is this little Carson kid and two, how does she know what breaking up is. I mean you have to be dating to break up and where are two kindergartners going to go, to the eagles nest?? But wait it gets worse, she then proceeds to tell Pam and I that she is sad because she wants a boyfriend so she can kiss him like mommy kisses daddy. WHOAA!! Hang on now, mommy lays some pretty hot kisses on daddy and if Tamara wants to kiss a boy like that there is going to be some butt whooping going on around here. I then proceed to my room and pull out my 34" Louisville Slugger to which I show Tamara and say, "Look, this is my boyfriend whooping bat so keep those stinking little boys away." This upset her because she says other girls have boyfriends and she wants one too. (What kind of little hussies does she hang out with?) Anyway, as I try to talk her down from this insaneness, I get a great idea, so I think. You see our friends have a little boy named Paden and he is in love with Tamara and is always trying to kiss her. However, Tamara wants nothing to do with Paden's kisses and usually knocks him on the ground when he tries. So as I think of this example I say, "Tamara if you really wanted to kiss a boy, you'd already have let Paden kiss you." To which she replied very loud and in a Tamara's matter of fact way, "No Dad, I want a ROMANTIC BOY!" Okay quit laughing because it is not funny, not even a little bit!!! At this point I knew I was in over my head and I simply got up and walked away leaving her mom to handle this one. All I could do was go to the other room watch baseball and try to figure out a plan to have this little Carson kid expelled from school. I now realize that it can only get worse from here, so this may be my last blog, i'm sure that there won't be internet or computers (or romantic boys) where we are about to move.....very, very, far, far, far away!
(If you dare laugh about this your computer will blow up in 10, 9, 8, 7.........)

Mr. Kleenex Pants

I am convinced that I wear Kleenex pants. You may be asking what in the world is that, well let me explain!! It doesn't matter what I have on, it can be my nastiest pair of shorts or my nicest pair of slacks, but my children and my dog insist on wiping their nasty snot on me. WHY?? Well this is a question I have been asking myself for awhile now and all I can come up with is I have Kleenex pants. For instance this morning I put on my nice clean pair of khaki shorts got ready for school, walked outside to feed my dogs and Sadie, my old blue heeler, greeted me with her normal snot wipe across the leg. Now most dogs wag their tails, jump up, bark, etc. but no not mine she simply wipes her nose on me. I'm pretty sure she knows I don't like it cause she does it and then steps back a couple of steps like, "Ha! Got you again!" And you know what, snot does not come off of clothes that easily and when it dries you have that nasty glazed doughnut look on you. It's no different with my children, I'll see them wipe their nose on their hands and then ever so secretly try to butter up to me so they can wipe their hands off on my leg. Well this is it, Mr. Kleenex Pants is fighting back. From now on every snot nosed, or booger hand that is wiped against my pants will be retaliated against with a big loogey to the side of the head. It has become personal now, and in this war against pants of booger destruction I will win. I will snot be defeated!!!!

Searching

This morning I have been sitting and searching. Wondering what I am supposed to do with my life, where I'm supposed to be. I have loved being a stay home dad over the last 3 years but both my girls are in school now and it's time for new direction, but what? As I sit and I ponder different ideas nothing jumps out and says, "yes! that is the one." I mean yes I am going to school, but I've never been sure that that is what I wanted to do. Honestly, I don't want to teach. However, I really do enjoy coaching so what am I to do? I have been in a struggle with this for some time now, but it just seems that the issue is becoming more pressing. I honestly feel completely lost. One of my biggest problems is I am too busy trying to make everyone else happy and do what everyone else thinks I should do, but that is me, that is who I am. I've always been that way and perhaps always will. It is not just one thing though, it never is. It is not just that I have no direction in my life, but we can't find a church, which is extremely disappointing and discouraging. Its as if we have tried every church in Odessa, and Midland that have good children programs and have younger couples and we just can't find anything. I am really growing tired of this as well and this weighs heavy on me daily. I know in life there are peaks and valleys it just seems that for awhile I have been in the Grand Canyon and I'm tired. Normally I hold most of my thoughts and emotions in, I might tell them to Pam but most of the time I keep them in. I know I have a good life and I do feel blessed, I'm just searching, searching for something that will make me happy, fulfilled and fill as though I have purpose. Sorry for dumping on my blog, it just usually helps me to write out my thoughts. Pray for me, that I might find direction, to find what I'm searching for and to give me peace inside, because I really am tired and I just need help through this valley in my life.

Probably Didn't Deserve That!!!!

Okay, I'll probably get in trouble for telling this. Wait, no....I'm sure I'll get in trouble for telling this but here it goes anyway. For those of you that don't know, my wife is an adventurous sleeper. Many a night, she has awoken me to her walking down our hall, falling out of bed, standing up in our bed, sticking her head in the ceiling fan, trying to leave the house....and the list goes on. I mean it's not her fault, she never recalls any of it but it makes for outstanding party time stories. (although they always lead to me getting into trouble) Well the other night she took it to a whole new level. I'm laying there fast asleep, probably dreaming about, hunting or fishing or kissing my beautiful wife or something along those lines when, ...WHAM!! I feel this sudden smack up side my head. Out of natural instinct I tuck and roll trying to remember some moves I have seen on a Jackie Chan movie or in UFC fight, thinking that I am going to have to defend my household from an intruder. At about the same time, I hear "Oh my God I hit you!" "Oh I'm so sorry I hit you!" As I open my one good eye I see Pam there fist clenched in horror at what she had just done, yet she was still fast asleep. (Its good to know that her subconscious has a conscious) Well I couldn't think of anything nice to say to Muhammad Alsleepy, so I just got up and went to the bathroom to survey the damage. Sure enough, my right eye was swelling up. Now I wanted to go defend my honor against the sleeping warrior, but decided I might lose that fight, so I surrendered to the couch to ice down my eye, watch sports center and nurse my wounded pride. I got beat up by a sleeping girl. (Note to self, go buy a cushioned boxing helmet to sleep in or else face the consequences.)

P.S. If y'all see me with a black eye, know now it was because I told this story not because she hit me again while I was sleeping!

Adversity

I'm really tired today. School was absolutely boring, and I still have a 3 hour lab tonight!!! Really can't see the light at the end of the tunnel, at least not today. I was looking online for something inspriational and instead found this, actually today it seems more fitting. :)

Where did the time go?

I haven't been able to talk about this without crying but I can write it because I can type without seeing. My baby Tamara started Kindergarten this year and it was one of the roughest things I've ever gone through. I was really depressed the first couple of days. It has taken alot of getting used to not having her around. She always made me smile and always gave me something to look forward to, but she was ready to go to school. The night before school started I went to her room to tuck her in. I didn't want to, I knew that if I let her go to sleep she would wake up and leave, and then I realized she was going to wake up and leave anyway. So I was laying with her in her bed with my head on her shoulder. She put her arm around me as if she knew how bad I was hurting and just ran her fingers through my hair. We talked and talked and I told her how the time I had been home with her was the best time I'd ever had in my life. The tears filled my eyes and a huge lump choked my throat and I found that no more words would come. It was then my little baby said, "Daddy" to which I replied "Yes" in a tear choked voice. "I love you Daddy." I couldn't hold the tears in anymore. Good thing it was dark. Then my little angel broke my heart as she said, "Daddy, I have to go to sleep now Daddy." There it was, the moment I was trying to avoid but could no longer be postponed. With tears rolling down my face, I said "I know baby," and tucked her in kissed her goodnight and went out to put the pieces of my broken heart back together. Being a parent is awesome but nobody or nothing can prepare you for things like this. I know she will do great and has awesome things in her future, but how I wish I could somehow make time roll back, however selfish and unfair that might be. Anyway I made a video for her while she was at school on her first day and thought I'd let all of you see it. Hope you enjoy, hope it makes you cry, its only fair that everyone else feels my sorrow too! :)

video

My Girls

Since I am just starting this blog thing I have some catching up to do. I at first thought all this blogging was pointless until I realized I write a journal daily and might as well share some of those thoughts with everyone else. I love my girls. Pam is truly the love of my life. I honestly do not know how or why she has stayed with me all this time but she has. We just celebrated our 8th anniversary and I can honestly say I love her more now than the day I married her. We have been through alot but it has made us who we are and I wouldn't change a thing. MaKayla is my mini me. She wants to do whatever I do, and wear whatever I wear and gets upset if I try and make her act more like a girl. She loves to hunt, fish, golf and play all sports. She will make a cool wife someday although I'm not ready to think about that right now. She is very quick witted and very sarcastic. We were recently talking about tests we have to take in school and I was explaining that I had a test with just 2 questions. She laughed and said "that's easy!" I then explained that each question had to be answered in 3-5 pages each. She said "wow that's alot." Then stood up and with extreme sarcasm said "well, good luck with that," and walked off. Don't know where she gets that sarcasm from. :) Tamara, she is my baby. She loves daddy to baby her and treat her like a princess. However, she is also like a piece of flubber. She never stops moving and is wild and crazy. She goes at everything she does 110% with no fear of injury until after it has happened. At 4 she jumped off a 10 foot diving board at Balmorhea (that Pam was afraid to go off of), at 5 she climbed a pole in front of our house and touched the roof, and learned to ride her bike without training wheels, (something she will point out that sister didn't learn to do until she was 7) and the list goes on and on. She loves being a cowboy, and thinks she would be a good bull rider. Recently her and MaKayla were playing and MaKayla was the bull and Tamara was the cowboy. MaKayla was bucking around and wouldn't set still for Tamara to mount up so Tamara yells out, "quit moving ya damn bull!" After I gained composure in the other room from laughing I asked her why she said that and she told me that's what she heard the cowboys say on T.V. , and that's my Tamara. I love my girls, there is never a dull moment, but never a moment I don't feel completely loved.






For those of you who don't know, I am a coach on MaKayla's soccer team, and we are the "Pink Panthers." As I was growing up I always imagined myself as a coach. Giving inspirational half-time talks, leading those hard practices that nobody likes but all benefit from, yelling at the "boys" and making them play to the best of their abilities. Now I find myself, in the middle of the huddle saying "look we can talk about Hannah Montana, and Zac Efron as soon as the game is over, can we please just focus on the game right now!" Not really the inspirational halftime talks I envisioned. And instead of yelling onto the field and saying "rip somebody's head off," I frequently find myself yelling "quit holding hands and hugging and play soccer!!!" This is not what I bargained for. I am a boy, I understand boy things, there is no crying in sports and most certainly no holding hands. However, it is still alot of fun. We still run the practices that nobody likes, yet they all benefit from and I still get to yell at players although not quite like how I anticipated. We are 6-1 on the season and have scored double digits in three of our games. For you girls who don't know anything about soccer that are reading this, that is pretty dang good. We are arguably the best team in our age division and are continually getting better. Other teams tremble when they see the Pink Panthers coming! Maybe it's because we're that good or maybe they've just never seen a grown man in pink camo.

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